GET YOUR TICKETS HERE!

No Laughs Left Behind

Lessons aren’t just for teachers — they’re also for laughing your assignments off! Let KML teach you a thing or two this Spring when we clap our erasers at everything from the first school to table manners and good ol’ talks with Pops. #2 pencils only, please.  MARK YOUR CALENDARS NOW!

Show Dates: May 30 – June 9, 2013

Thursdays, Fridays and Saturdays @ 8pm
Sundays @ 7pm

Show Location: Stage Werx Theatre
446 Valencia street (@ 16th) San Francisco, CA 94110

$10 Preview | Thursday, May 30th

Opening Night | Friday, May 31st

826 Valencia Beneficiary Night | Sunday, June 2nd
For every $25 ticket purchased, KML will donate $5 to 826 Valencia!

SF Food Bank Beneficiary Night | Friday, June 7th
For every $25 ticket purchased, KML will donate $5 to the SF Food Bank!

Pay-What-You-Can Show | Saturday, June 8th
Poster art by James C Trujillo
Poster design by Ty Bardi

Get up close and personal with KML Classes!

KML SUMMER CLASSES & WORKSHOPS ARE NOW OPEN FOR ENROLLMENT!

SHRUG OFF THOSE SPRING SWEATERS AND TAKE A CLASS WITH KML!

• Teen Summer Classes - NOW ONLY $215!
• Writing 1 - Our most popular class! Sign up quick!
• Filmmaking Workshop - Work with KML’s finest and funniest and produce your own comedic video short!

For more information about Summer courses, please visit our CLASSES PAGE.

A casual dinner party turns awkward in this video called “Yay, Purim!”

(Video was produced as part of our most recent collaboration with Dan Wolf and the JCC for a one-night Purim carnival/celebration called “Megillah 3.0″.)

Apoc-a-con
Written and Directed by Njon Weinroth
Camera and Editor: Christopher Knox

Starring:
Allison Page, Daniel McElroy, Gareth Marsh

Apoca-date
Written by Ken Grobe and Janne Campbell
Directed by Jon Burton

Starring:
Brian Allen, Molly Benson, Janne Campbell, Millie DeBenedet, Joe Estlack, Matt Gunnison, Wylie Herman, Sarah Mitchell, Anthony Tupasi

Stay tuned for our KML 2013 Season announcement! Coming soon!

Place your bid below to win a date to the KML “Quinceañera” Prom with our own stunning KML Company member, Millie DeBenedet!

She’s funny, she’s beautiful, and she’ll charm the pants off you! (KML cannot guarantee full removal of said pants.)

Bidding closes on Thursday, September 13th at 6:00PM SHARP!
(The winning bidder will be notified on the payment process.)

Check out the video to see what you can expect from a date with the one and only, Millie!

KML’s 15th Anniversary event makes the hot list of top 20 things to do in San Francisco this month! See their post below – and be sure to buy your tickets to the September 14th event here.

Killing My Lobster’s Quinceañera Prom
When: September 14, 8 to 11:55 p.m.
What: There’s nothing sketchy about this comedy gang who deliver some of the best, wiggle-in-your-seat-uncomfortable moments during their crack-up live performances. We expect this “prom” fundraiser to benefit the troupe to be no different. So don your best cotton-candy-colored dress, rhinestones, and dark lip-liner, pull that hair up in some sweet tendrils, and go awkwardly stand up against the wall until someone asks you to dance.
Where: Verdi Club, 2424 Mariposa St (between Potrero Avenue and Hampshire Street), San Francisco; 415-861-9199.

KML brings you an info-tainment video to answer all of your Quinceañera queries!

Quinceañera (lit. meaning One (f.) who is fifteen), sometimes called Fiesta de Quince Años, Fiesta de Quinceañera, Quince Años or simply Quince, is the celebration of a girl’s fifteenth birthday.

Well, KML is one lucky lady because she’s 15 years old this year and we’re having a PARTY!

Verdi Club
September 14th, 2012
8pm – 12am

Event to feature:

• Live music!
• Silent auction!
• Secret special guests!
• Comedy for the ages!
• And so much more!

ACT’s phenomenal run of Beckett’s ENDGAME has more than just the legendary Bill Irwin to brag about. Now it has us!
Join us following the 8 p.m. performance on Thursday, May 24, as Killing My Lobster presents a hilarious spin on the themes and characters of some of Beckett’s most famous works, from Endgame and Play to Waiting for Godot.

The performance will begin 15 minutes after the final curtain (approximately 10:15 p.m.). Possible sketches include “Hunger End Games,” “Cooking with Clov,” and a speed-dating sketch featuring Beckett characters.

Admission is free, and we’ll be on ACT’s mainstage! There might even be a special guest appearance by… Tony Award Winning Actor Bill Irwin.

Killing My Lobster leaves no family stone unturned as they wrap their claws around Prop 8, public nursing, sibling rivalry, and negligent parents! From The Brady Bunch to the Manning brothers, no family goes unscathed in this raucous slashing of the ties that bind!

Dates:
Thursday April 26, 2012 – Sunday May 13, 2012

Prices:
$10.00 – $22.00

Location:
TJT Theatre
470 Florida between 17th & Mariposa
San Francisco, CA 94110

Buy tickets here!

And here’s some photos from the show:

“Dear Esther”  is written by Esther also known as Queen of Shushan also known as Queen Jewess also known as ‘the one who saved the Jews the first time’.  It is the most popular and widely syndicated column in all of Shushan known for its honesty and biblical perspective.

Dear Esther,

I’ve been drinking the wine sweetened with lead as the apothecary prescribed and I’ve been soaking in camel poop and ground figs for months, but now my skin tone is uneven, especially in my T-zone. What’s your secret? Signed, Jasmine

Jasmine,

You won’t believe this, but your Auntie Esther was a pageant queen back in her day. I was a real hot hamantaschen. And you know, The King wasn’t the only one sniffing my babushka. They were all interested, even the eunuchs. I could have had anyone.  My secret?  Lots of kugel. Gives the King a little something to grab onto on those cold Shushan nights. 

Dear Esther,

We think our daughter may be dating a Moor but we’re not sure how to bring it up. We have nothing against them as a people, but we are a very traditional family. Should we stone her?  Agustus

Dear Agustus,

Stoning? For me, it’s overkill. But what do I know? I’m just a simple jewish girl who likes to defend her people and massacre others. That’s me. I don’t judge. Even when I see what’s going on at the Feldman’s across the street. The coming and going at all hours of the night? I just keep to myself. Like I said to my fried, Myrtle, is it my business that the youngest girl is a harlot? No. I stay out of it. But just between us, I think its drugs. You don’t get that thin milking goats.

Dear Esther, my husband has left the barn door open again and all the goats have escaped.  What do I do? 

Dear Goat Rodeo,

Oy. My husband is forgetful too. Always with the “do you know where I left my favorite rope belt, tell me again who saved my life, what time is dinner with the Goldblatts on Thursday?” It’s a real schnickle in my guggannah. Here’s what you should do. Get yourself a nice eunuch to help out around the yurt. And have some brisket. You’re too thin.

Esther

The Whole Megillah 2: Uncut

Purim Sketch Comedy with Killing My Lobster

Directed by The Hub’s Dan Wolf

Comedy troupe Killing My Lobster and The Hub at the JCCSF return with their popular treif Purim Sketch Comedy Show. This year they are bringing back old favorites (Seinfeld, Drag Queens and Interventions, anyone?) and returning to the writing room to see what other trouble they can get into. One thing is for certain: the Book of Esther will never be the same.

March 1, 2, 8 & 9, 8:00 pm
March 3 & 10, 7:00 pm & 10:00 pm
The Jewish Theatre
470 Florida St

March 7, 8:00 pm
JCCSF’s Kanbar Hall

Tickets available here

We’re Back! Killing My Lobster Performs 2 Shows in SF Sketchfest 2012

To say we are excited about performing in SF Sketchfest 2012 would be an understatement! KML will be performing our “Best of Show 2011” show. You’ll see the best sketches and videos from 2011, plus we’ll be premiering a brand new comedy video, and dusting off a “Greatest Hit” sketch from 2006’s “KML Faces The Music”!  Also, our musical accompaniment for both shows will be the wildly popular

and hilarious band, The Boneless Children Foundation.

The Huffington Post picked KML as a “Highlight” from this year’s SF Sketchfest! Read
all about it here.

On January 28^th, we are honored to be the opening act for Rick Overton’s new show “Substitute Global Ambassador”.  Come see us open with a 30-minute set and stay for Rick’s hilarious new show!

The show will be recorded by Sirius Radio and The
Raw Dog Comedy Channel for a later
broadcast, so let your laughter be heard!

Also check us out in San Francisco Magazine!

On February 1^st, we are HEADLINING and will treat you to a full hour set from the best sketches and videos of our 2011 shows! Our “Best Of Show 2011” show includes sketches about sexy butter churning, to murder on a chessboard, to a typical dysfunctional family celebrating Arbor Day. Not to mention a few of our best videos from last year. This is going to be a great night and we are pleased to be working with the comedy act “Thunderstood”.

KML with Rick Overton (opening)

WHAT: Best of Show 2011 show
WHERE: The Eureka Theater
WHEN: Saturday January 28^th
TIME: 8 pm
TICKETS: http://www.sfsketchfest.com/schedule/#Jan282012

KML with Thunderstood (headlining)

WHAT: Best of Show 2011 show
WHERE: The Eureka Theater
WHEN: Wednesday February 1st
TIME: 8 pm
TICKETS: http://www.sfsketchfest.com/schedule/#Feb012012