| may 24 - 30 |
| carb-free, sugar-free, constipated |
| hi: 77 |
| lo: 51 |
Contributed by MJV, May 2004
The Day After The Day After Tomorrow
In which sanitation workers who survived an apocalyptic storm pick up a lot
of trash and mutter to themselves about spoiled college kids who party a lot and never
think about who has to pick up after them.
Coffee and Cigarettes and Eclipse Gum
Various Hollywood celebrities, most notably Wu-Tang's the RZA and Sesame Street's
Elmo shoot the breeze. Post-mod topics covered in this Jarmuch feature include addiction, how
to keep your teeth white and the relative meaning of the term "minty."
Newark Minute
Two precious twin tweenagers wait at baggage claim at Newark International Airport
wondering if they should have just brought carry-ons.
Van Helsing-along
In the spirit of "The Sing-Along Sound of Music",
a gripping tale of vampires, werewolves and whatever creature Harry was in "Harry and the Hendersons"
is set to music and audiences from coast to coast are offered a chance to download sheet music
and sing along with the film.
Troy, NY
A timeless epic in which legions of pipe-fitters, sheet metal workers and arc welders
from Utica, Ithaca and Rochester band together to raid the mighty city of the Hudson
River valley and steal back the princess Shawndra.
Spider Man 2: Electric Boogaloo
A kid from Brooklyn who just can't get a break is bitten by a radio active
arachnid and imbued with the irrespresible urge to learn how to pop, lock and do
the worm in an increasingly frustrating (and tiring!) attempt to save a community center.
The Manchurian Candidate (For Neighborhood Council, Ward 7)
The movie that epitomized cold-war paranoia is updated and set in a leafy Washington,
DC neighborhood struggling with a new street-cleaning schedule.
Around the World in .8 Seconds
A micro-chronicle of a Google search for the word "boner."
Garfield
Finally, a long-overdue part animation/part live-action biopic about everyone's
favorite assassinated 19th century chief executive.
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