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In lieu of my Bewley report this week, I thought I would forward along this special holiday greeting that is copied verbatim from a letter I received the other day in the mail. Despite it being a fairly straightforward name to pronounce and to spell, I often get mixed up mail for Beulay, Benley, Beenles, and Bukey. Somehow I must be listed on a Bewbey holiday list. Clearly this person just send out a card to every Bewbey he could find. Enjoy this greeting and know that I also wish you a "Merry Christmas if you celebrate it", but more importantly a joyous holiday and wonderful New Year.
Bewley, on to 2003...
Dear friend,
As I sit to write down to write my annual holiday note to you, I paused, then began typing, and then paused again. This went on throughout the writing process. In no time I had reached this, the third line of the letter. Which for me stands out as a true accomplishment and a sign of encouragement that I will complete this letter.
Wow. New paragraph! Ê
Where to start, my friends, for two double zero two has been an adventurous and a busy year, full of bright expectations and bitter losses. The loss of my dear Diana was tempered slightly by my finding a sock I thought lost for well over a month. And though she now lives in Hayward with the man who broke my heart, I am enjoying wearing both socks now. Viva la difference! Or in this case, perhaps it is Viva la similar! Because now, of course I have two socks that match. I still have not forwarded her mail. I hope that insurance bill isn't something she'll need when it comes time to renew her thyroid medication. But I wish her the best. Ê
My health is still with me, for which I am thankful. But healthy lungs are poor consolation to the lonely truth of not having anyone to share the little moments with. No one to giggle with me when I get the froth of the cappuccino on my nose. No one to cry out to when I take a nasty tumble down the basement stairs and end up covered in broken glass and beer. Mr. Garcia, my neighbor, heard me after a day or so and helped tend my wounds. Though not before also tending to my garden tools, but I will call him as soon as I get done with this note if I can find a payphone in good working order.
My sister Rhonda has taken off on quite a journey of discovery. She has married an Asian man whom she met while working as a barrista at her Starbucks. I enjoy his insights into the finer points of eggnog latte creation and the origins of the Venti sized cups, but my friends, Toan has a lot to learn about personal hygiene. I tried to bring this up with Rhonda, but alas, she is blinded by her beating heart, and quite possibly by his potent body perfume. They now live in Thorndale, and are expecting twins. If you happen to run into her, please tell her I died in a boating accident. She will understand and hopefully this means less responsibility for me as an uncle.
And speaking of nephews... (They sure taught us about segues in Toastmasters didn't they! Thank you, Mr. Percoletti! I am eternally grateful. And speaking of grateful...) My youngest nephew Reggie has had a terrific time spending the summer at squash camp. I am not really sure how squash works, and having watched one game, I am sure I will not like it, or care to inquire more about it. Luckily I only see him twice a year, which is enough for me to ask, "How's the game coming?" and he can answer in his garbled squash gobbledy gook while I can pull another sip of my very special tea down to a waiting and eager gullet.
My father continues his pursuit of the perfect wooden spoon. He has been traveling as you may have heard, throughout the American Southwest, for something he refers to as his spirit spoon. I suspect this may be some woman he met at a truckstop on his route, but he won't spill the beans and tells me he has a few more spoon huts to check, before he could possible make the trip out to see me or spend any time with me. Though is was sorry about the whole Linda thing, to which I must remind him that her name was Diana, and that Linda was the one with the glass eye, who bore the burden of a serious chip on her shoulder and suffered from low self esteem and eye clouding. He says whatever, and usually the operator asks for more quarters but by the time I fish them out of my trousers, he is gone. Ê
But I am looking forward to the holidays this year, and I am so happy I can be there in spirit with you as you read these words. I hope you're still reading. I am so exited to have reached a page break; I can barely breathe, and may have to take an "ice cream and TV" break before I return to my holiday news.
Ok. I am back! Ê
This year, I am not asking for anything from God Almighty, but instead praying for all of you, my family and friends, who I know fear for their own misfortune simply by being in close emotional proximity to yours truly.
But worry not, for 2003 holds the promise of a new era. An era of shimmering gold cakes of job opportunities and fancy popovers of romance. I trust all is well with your loved ones, and that they are locked safely away from any evil-doers. Have a holly jolly Christmas, and give my best to your family. Especially if they are internet accessible and can check out one of my many items of Diana's on ebay (username girlfriendsstuff1976). Happy bidding!
Merry Christmas if you celebrate it!
Matt Bewbey
Bewley,
Out.
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