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Everything I Need to Know I Learned From my 18-Month-Old Niece
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| nov 31 - dec 7 |
| noticing the crack in the wall, moving the potted plant |
| hi: 63 |
| lo: 33 |
Contributed by JCW, December 2003
Ah, the holidays. A chance to catch up with the fam', kick back and celebrate those you love and those you miss. I spent a lot of QT with my little niece, and in that time, learned a few principles by which she lives -- formed greatly by her reactions to those around her who keep trying to make her laugh, eat, etc. -- principles that can hold true for all of us...
1. You can sit in your own shit for about 10 minutes, then all you want to do is cry.
2. A hot dog followed by a whole-milk chaser will certainly make you vomit.
3. Nothing is as unfunny as an entire room full of people trying to make you laugh.
4. Sometimes the mere ability to remember someone's name will bring that person profound joy.
5. The box the present comes in is often more interesting than the thing inside.
6. Most of what's on TV is worth sleeping through.
7. When dancing to a song you don't know, listen for the base line and just move along with that.
8. Sometimes the hardest thing in the world to do is to stand up.
9. When all esle fails: applesauce.
10. It's easier to fall asleep in the arms of a good woman. |
