We all grew up with children's story books that used cute anthropomorphic characters and bright colors to impart some cautionary advice or morality tale. One of the most beloved of these characters is Curious George, the mischievous monkey that wreaks havoc with his unbridled curiosity. Penned by H.A. and Margret Rey between 1941 and 1966, the escapades of Curious George hearken back to a simpler, more innocent time when the curiosity of monkeys was rewarded with movie contracts (Curious George Takes a Job) and trips into space (Curious George Gets a Medal). However, in the 21^st century, when satisfying your curiosity by simply checking out a book from the library can be used against you by the FBI, children need new messages and stronger reinforcements of long standing advice. To prepare children for the 21^st century, 40 Foot Buffet proposes the following new titles for the Curious George series. As an added bonus for parents and educators, we've included an indication of the lesson learned or reinforced with each new title.

Curious George Meets a BTK Serial Killer - Having had his distrust of strangers diminished by the kindness of The Man in the Yellow Hat, Curious George befriends a local man who ends up being a 'bind, torture and kill'or 'BTK'serial killer. The BTK killer lures Curious George back to his basement by offering to let Curious George play Madden NFL 06 on his Xbox 360. Curious George falls for this ploy, but is rescued at the last minute by The Man in the Yellow Hat and the FBI's criminal profiling team.

Lessons Reinforced: Still don't talk to strangers.

Curious George and International Diplomacy - In an unprecedented national political recall, remarkably Un-Curious George W. is recalled and replaced with lovably Curious George as President and the Man in the Yellow Hat as Vice-President. Endearing himself to the world and spreading carefree laughter via his hilarious hijinks, Curious George works wonders in international diplomacy. He is able to withdraw American troops from Iraq within three months after negotiating peace between the Sunni, Sufis and Kurds that leads to the formation of the United States of Iraq; convinces Iran to give up its nuclear program; and gets the Palestinians and the Israelis to make nice once and for all. He also convinces England to give the Falkland Islands back to Argentina. Curious George wins a Noble Peace Prize, is voted Time magazine’s Man of the Year and marries Charlize Theron.

Lessons Learned: Paul Wolfowitz is coward and can't be trusted if he does not have the cajones to stay around and help clean up the mess he helped start; democracy rocks; all the world loves  hilarious hijinks

Curious George Joins a Celebrity Reality TV Show - After a decade-long dry spell of adventures, Curious George joins a reality show staring other washed up, behind-the-times storybook characters. The cast includes a Star-Bellied Sneech, the Little Engine That Could (fresh off an endorsement gig for Viagra), Sister Berenstain Bear and Clifford the Big Red Dog. Curious George's curiosity gets him into trouble as walks in on a naked Star-Bellie Sneech and the Little Engine That Could and also sneaks a peek at  Sister Berenstain Bear's diary. Curious George later uses information from Sister Berenstain Bear's diary to get her voted off the show. Popular opinion of Curious George plummets, leading to another decade-long dry spell of work at the conclusion of the series.

Lessons Reinforced: Respect others' privacy; play well with others

Curious George and the Phishing Scam - Curious George unwittingly gives the credit card number, date of birth and social security number of The Man in the Yellow Hat to a "phisher"�. The Man in the Yellow Hat's bank account is wiped out and his identity is stolen. Bitter, bankrupt and evicted from their home, The Man in the Yellow Hat and Curious George begin robbing liquor stores and gas stations along the Mid-Atlantic coast to make ends meet. After a shoot-out with Maryland State Troopers, The Man with the Yellow Hat is critically wounded, but George escapes to Mexico and lives out the rest of his life a fugitive from the law.

Lessons Learned: Only give out your personal information to trusted sources; keep monkeys away from computers

Curious George Has an Identity Crisis - After watching Bonzo goes to College and Planet of the Apes, Curious George begins to feel inadequate and unfulfilled, wondering why he can't go to college, rule the planet and make out with Kim Hunter. Curious George enters intense psychotherapy, learns to love himself for who he is and realizes that sometimes a banana is just a banana.

Lesson Reinforced: Be true to yourself

Curious George Discovers "Gateway" Drugs - On a trip to the corner Kwik Stop for milk, bananas and a pack of smokes for The Man in the Yellow Hat, Curious George is offered a joint "on the house" by Bubba, the local stoner and small-time drug dealer. Eventually getting bored with marijuana's lethargy-inducing characteristics and gaining weight from constantly having the munchies, Curious George turns to harder drugs for his kicks. Cocaine, crystal meth and Ecstasy are all tried before Curious George gets hooked on heroin. After an intervention by The Man in the Yellow Hat, Curious George enters rehab with James Frey, author A Million Little Pieces, and eventually pens his own memoir of addiction and recovery, A Spanked Monkey: The Curious Habits of a Tragic Monkey. Frey's book is made a selection by Oprah's Book Club, while Curious George's book is short-listed for a National Book Award. The feud is later settled by a pay-per-view televised steel-cage wrestling match produced by Oprah, the National Book Award jurors and Spike TV.

Lesson Reinforced: Say "no" to drugs - even if they are free.